When I am non-doing, I go with the natural flow of things. I say ‘yes’ to life as it is. Doing, on the other hand, resists life. Doing tries to control the flow of life, to ‘shape’ it, to redirect it or even to stop it. A reflection.
Victim status is like a prison cell with the key inside. It works like a time machine: inside the prison cell is the past, when the devastating experience took place. Outside is the present, where we are safe. Often there are many years between the present and the past. It is important to be able to feel this distance. Read more.
When faced with an existential threat and neither fight nor flight is possible, panic triggers the last survival mode our reptilian brain has in store for us: paralysis or impotence. This gives us an additional chance of survival. However, this mode comes at a price: it freezes those parts of our existence that are affected by the devastating threat. This frozen life later rears its head in the form of all sorts of symptoms, demanding to be thawed.
Being a victim means I am powerless. I am therefore incapable of acting and therefore innocent. During the constellation work with the stages of life (time in the womb, childhood, adolescence and adulthood) I came across an astonishing parallel: the childhood experience, as shown in Wilfried Nelles’ Life Integration Process, corresponds very closely to the inner dynamics of the victim status. In the following I will therefore examine the victim state of childhood as a stage of life and consciousness, and how the connection to the present can work.
The Life Integration Process (LIP according to Nelles) is completely focused on the here and now. It is no longer about solving problems, but about completing the external process of adulthood that comes with age internally (emotionally) and truly accepting the inner freedom that comes with it. It has a deep and lasting effect, bringing resolution and strength.
This describes the core of my work: unintentional observation. Or: how to allow yourself to experience what is happening, what is real. I allow my perceptions to be true. Exactly as they appear. The effects are amazing.
Supervision constellations are a great way to quickly get a clear picture of your role in specific professional challenges and what you might need to change to be more relaxed and effective.
Organisational constellations focus on the unconscious systemic background of everyday professional, institutional and corporate life. From this perspective, success or failure, development or stagnation, successful change or chaos are a specific function of the overall system. This also applies to the experiences of individuals in their everyday working lives. Successful, fulfilling work on the one hand, and frustration and burnout on the other, are often the result of systemic processes in the background, rather than a purely individual phenomenon.
Clearly, it is not a matter of eagerly forcing disabled people into an unquestioned ‘normality’, of mothering them in every way and encouraging them to the point of exhaustion. Rather, it is about recognising their achievements in life and treating them as people with a special function.
Trance is a special form of awareness. It is less outward and more inward. It is less goal-oriented or associated with tension and action, and more with introspection, relaxation and a more undefined focus. This brings inner states, images and deeper levels of consciousness into view.
In bodywork we use mindfulness and body awareness to allow the body to tell its stories and, above all, to let them be told to the end. This gives even severe traumas the opportunity to dissolve gently. They can be transformed from a paralysing state of shock into what they really are: memories of something threatening that belongs to us but no longer affects us.
Outcomes may be: The war between two departments after the last reorganisation comes to an end because their roles are now valued differently. A brand that had almost disappeared from the market is given a new lease of life by a new focus on its customer base. Years of resistance from a local community turns into support because it is suddenly seen as a resource for the business. The junior manager, previously unhappy in his role, gains considerable strength and, above all, the trust of his staff, because he has learned to see the achievements of the company’s founder in a new light.
Systemic constellations bring to light unconscious connections and loyalties that influence our conflicts, crises and illnesses. When we look at this unconscious reality with an open heart, deep inner healing processes can begin. By accepting what is, we gain access to both old pain and our own sources of strength. And we do this with love, without wanting to change anything or take anything away.
Courage arises when desire becomes greater than fear. The desire for life lives in each of us, otherwise we would not have been born. The same goes for fear of the world, of others and of ourselves, otherwise you would not be reading this and I would not have written it.
My symptom is not just a malfunction that I have to fight and get rid of, it is also an inner guide acting on behalf of my soul. So it’s not just resistance, but surrender; not fighting, but following. How can that work?
